Food; Back to Normal. Maybe Better than Ever.

When I was in high school, I had friends who scooped at ice cream parlors. Now, there was something I couldn’t do. As a serious compulsive eater, I would have been binged poor Baskin Robbins into bankruptcy. Ice cream parlor loomed as one of the most dangerous places on earth.

My friends who worked there assured me that they quickly got sick of ice cream and practically never wanted to eat it again for the rest of their lives – after like, two weeks on the job!

That would NEVER have happened to me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The idea of getting sick of any food (and ice cream) was so foreign to me. Mass quantities of junky food was my norm.

Today, I find myself as a restaurant manager, surrounded by food, lots of which I love, many of which I rarely eat. If you’ve been reading the blog, you know that working around food all the time lately threw me off for a minute. I knew I had to adjust, one way or the other.

I have. For my first couple of weeks on the job, food looked more interesting than usual, and that worried me. I eyed an awful lot of french fries..and ate more than usual. Plus, after being out of work and pretty poor for a while, free food seemed particularly enticing.

It didn’t bother me much – in the grand scheme of life, so what? But, I felt less comfortable than I’ve been in years. I had two choices – get comfortable with the new norm or change.

I hadn’t made my decision about which path to follow, but Sunday at work, I realized that I had, once again, lost interest in food, even french fries. I wasn’t hungry, so why eat? It’s been that way since Sunday – I don’t even want the salad bar unless I feel hunger in my belly.

In fact, I think I might be getting sick of the restaurant’s food!!! (Hallelujah, they’ll stay in business!) I just want to come home and make some eggs. When I’m hungry.

I’m not sure how this shift happened, but I suspect it had to do with knowing my truth. I know I can’t graze all day mindlessly. I know indulging in french fries and chocolate chip mint ice cream does me no good. I know I am happy AND FREE when I eat what’s best for me. Me, who’s never been a natural eater and never will be.

I feel relaxed and easy again. Far preferable.

I am glad I went through the experience of being a little edgy around food again. Whenever that happens – and it’s rare- I always come out stronger than before. I’ll take that!

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