For the Not Naturally Thin

Last night, training at the restaurant, I worked with a super tall, skinny guy who warned me I’d sweat out 5 pounds just working in the kitchen and running food around the dining room.

Since I started working at the restaurant, I’ve been constantly on the run, back and forth – dining room, lounge, kitchen, repeat. Some nights, I’ve worried my 54 year old body wasn’t up to all the flying around.

In my old job, I sat in my car while commuting two hours, sat all day and came home and sat some more, reading or watching TV. I probably burned 10 calories a day. So with my serious uptick in movement, it made sense that I’d be losing weight, right?

I haven’t weighed myself since I saw the doctor in early April. Curious, I jumped on the scale this morning.

I’ve gained 5 pounds. How could that be?

I’ll tell you exactly how. I’m eating more than I used to. For me, it’s all about the food, not the exercise.

AND, I am NOT naturally thin. The tall, skinny kid who trained me last night, ate constantly thru his shift – fries, ice cream, bread – anything and everything. And I’m sure he DID, in fact, lose the promised 5.

Not me. The truth is I have been way less vigilant about food. I’m working much longer hours, am way more tired and my sleep pattern is off. When I’m tired, my body and mind tell me to eat for energy, but I’m not truly hungry or actually in need of food. For me, I must eat to true hunger – eat when I’m hungry and stop before full. I haven’t been as in touch or paying attention.

I am, however, very happy and enjoying my new job. Once upon a time, I thought if i were happy, I’d naturally lose weight, because I wouldn’t want to over-eat – joy would nourish me.

The truth is, I’m not thin by nature. Pounds never, ever just ‘fall off’. If I stop watching, I gain quite a bit of weight and very quickly.

I always have to remember who I am, my truth. If I want to fit into my clothes, I need to eat the way that’s best for me.

I’m not naturally thin AND I am very happy.

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